Bagging the PM

Australia's first female Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, won, if that is the word for such a knife-edge result, the first election ever contested by a female leader of a major political party. This was another milestone moment to please the hearts of the socially progressive (statistics show that female Premiers elected by the party room between elections have not been so lucky come polling day.)

Despite winning the election the Prime Minister has clearly still not won the right to rid herself of The Australian newspaper’s regressive, taunting scrutiny. Glenda Korporaal’s post election-result article ‘Julia enjoys the high life free of old bags’ is dedicated to the fact that the Prime Minister is rarely seen with a handbag. The writer, and the newspaper she works for, clearly considers this to be an issue worthy of mention and discussion.

The articles states that most woman carry handbags and infers that the PM considers herself to be apart, perhaps better, than the average Australian woman because she does not tote a bag. “There is an air of royalty about her that assumes someone else is following along answering the phone, parking the car, taking notes and paying for whatever needs to be paid for.” I do not recall seeing any of this country’s male Prime Minister’s carrying a briefcase, satchel or manbag. I do not recall bewildered articles in newspapers commenting on this fact and the existence of assistants employed to ‘assist’ them when they had held the office of most important public servant in the country.

The ‘journalist’ also uses the piece to snidely reference Julia Gillard’s childless state “it is certain our first female Prime Minister has never had to go through the tote-bag-as-mobile-nursery routine that is the lot of mothers of young children.”

What has raising a child got to do with carrying a handbag, and what does carrying a handbag, or not, got to do with running a country?

And more importantly what does writing articles like this have to do with journalism?

Song of the Week - Election Special

It's Song of the Week time.

The federal election campaign continues and on August 21 we will have to choose between political candidates who are all singing the same tune:

“Would I Lie to You?”

But in the spirit of the election I am giving you the choice of either the Eurythmics or the Charles and Eddie versions of songs titled “Would I Lie to You?”

or

Exercise your democratic right and tell me which song you prefer!


(includes obligatory high-drama 80’s music-video intro)

Eurythmics

Lyrics

CHORUS:
Would I lie to you?
Would I lie to you honey?

Now would I say something that wasn't true?
I'm asking you sugar
Would I lie to you?

My friends - know what's in store.
I won't be here anymore.
I've packed my bagsI've cleaned the floor.
Watch me walkin'.
Walkin' out the door.

(Believe me - I'll make it make it)

CHORUS

Tell you straight - no intervention.
To your face - no deception.
You're the biggest fake.
That much is true.
Had all I can take.
Now I'm leaving you

(Believe me - I'll make it make it)

CHORUS repeats

My friends - know what's in store.
I won't be here anymore.
I've packed my bags
I've cleaned the floor.
Watch me walkin'.
Walkin' out the door.

CHORUS






Charles and Eddie

Lyrics

Oh baby oh would I lie to you?
Look into my eyes
Can't you see they're open wide
Would I lie to you?

CHORUS
Look into my eyes
Can't you see they're open wide
Would I lie to you baby?
Would I lie to you??...oh yeah
Don't you know it's true
Girl there's no-one else but you
Would I lie to you baby?
Would I lie to you?

Everybody wants to know the truth
In my arms is the only proof
I've hidden my heart behind the bedroom door
Now it's open I can't do no more
I'm telling you baby...
You will never find another girl in this heart of mine

CHORUS

Everybody's got their history
on every page - a mystery
You can read my diary you're in every line
jealous mind never satisfied
I'm telling you baby...
You will never find another girl in this heart of mine

CHORUS

When you wanna see me night and day (would I lie?)
If I tell you that I'm here to stay (would I lie to you?)
Do you think I give my love away? (would I lie?)
That's not the kind of game I play
I'm telling you baby...
You will never find another girl in this heart of mine

CHORUS

Trust me baby
Hey aint no-one else but you child
Come on, Come on, Come on...
Trust me babyI wouldn't lie to you baby

---------------
Random facts:

Eurythmics’ song was released 25 years ago (1985) and only made it as high #17 in the UK, #5 in the US but it was #1 in Australia.

The Charles and Eddie song was released in 1992 and reached #13 in the US but #1 in the UK and Australia. It was knocked from the #1 spot by Whitney Huston’s I Will Always Love You

Charles and Eddie were American. Charles died of cancer in 2001 aged 37. Eddie wrote songs for 90’s British girl group Eternal

All the Swinging Voters - Election Beyonce parody

All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters

Now put your hands up
Up in the booth, I just voted
I’m doing my own little thing
Decided my vote and I’m gonna stick
Cause no other party seduced me

I’m up on Tony, But not on Bob
Why don’t we pay him any attention?
I’ve made my decision, for three more years
Ya can’t be mad at me

Cause if you liked it then you should vote 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see the new PM
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Oh, oh, oh

If you liked it then you should have voted 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see the new Cabinet
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it

PM’s got gloss on her lips, de-facto on her hips
He styles her hair, gives it that salon sheen
But leaks are up, Libs are Standing Up
This election is a close run thing.

PM ‘s on a mission, It’s Game On
The real Julia will get your attention
Cause the polls liked her at first, despite that nasal twang
but will that be enough to stop that swing?

Cause if you liked it then you should have voted 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see the new Cabinet
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it

Oh, oh, oh

If you liked it then you should have voted 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see the new Cabinet
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Oh, oh, oh

Don’t treat me to soundbites that you think I want to hear!
I’m not that kind of marginal
Your trust is what I prefer, what I deserve

New Tony’s remade, trying to fake me and
a vote for him could mean our destiny, is smuggled budgies and triathlons…
Pull me into your spin, say ‘No Workchoices’ again and again
If you don’t, you’ll be alone
And like Rudd, you’ll be gone

All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters, all the swinging voters
All the swinging voters

Now put your hands up, oh, oh, oh
Cause if you liked it then you should voted 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see what you have done
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it

Oh, oh, oh

If you liked it then you should have voted 1 on it
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it
Don’t be mad once you see the new Cabinet
If you liked it then you shoulda voted 1 on it

Oh, oh, oh

Why Move Forward when you can be Pens and not move?

In the 2010 Federal Election much has been made of Labor's Moving Forward slogan. Perhaps the Coalition's unofficial slogan, befitting their backwards-looking conservatism, is Stand Still. Be Stationary. That could explain why parents can claim for 'stationary' but apparently not pencils and rulers in the Coalition Education Tax Refund policy.


I hope Labor's Moving Forward package includes funding for much needed spelling and proofreading lessons for political staffers.

Irony-fisted

Shadow Minister for Immigration and Citizenship, Scott Morrison, MP, is currently responsible for spruiking the opposition immigration policy that seeks to forcefully turn around the often unseaworthy boats of asylum seekers without assessing their claims for asylum. Prior to entering politics, Morrison was Managing Director of Tourism Australia and was paid handsomely to convince the world’s citizens that Australia was the best place on earth and that everyone should come visit. Oh the irony. Perhaps he just did his job too well? Morrison was Managing Director when Lara Bingle asked the infamous question, "Where the bloody hell are you?" The response "Nearly there! I am somewhere near Christmas Island" is obviously not what Morrison was looking for.


Where the bloody hell are your ethics Scott Morrison?



We've saved a spot for you, it's called Nauru.

Silvio TKO

Am I alone in thinking that Italain Prime Minsiter Silvio Berlusconi looked a bit like Hitler in this photo taken after he was assualted in Milan this month?

Kirby Your Enthusiam

66 year-old maverick (that is, borderline psychotic and arrogantly irresponsible) New South Wales Liberal Senator Bill Heffernan will almost certainly be re-elected at the 2010 Federal election after being placed 2nd on the Liberal Senate Ticket. Presumably he will spend this next term in office deliberately and gleefully slandering social liberals like he pilloried Justice Kirby.

Heffernan was quoted after the result saying,

"I can't think of anyone else in the federal parliament who can knock the nuts out of a bull or skin a sheep"

Yes Bill - but do you knock the nuts out with your teeth huh Bill? Huh? Or do you use a knife you city-slicking pansy.