Showing posts with label why?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label why?. Show all posts

26 May 2011

Metal grins are a sin.


Regular readers of this blog will have noticed that (A): They have too much time on their hands and will read any old crapola as a form of work-avoidance and (B): That I have previously blogged about the Australian Tax Office 100th Anniversary 20 cent commemorative coin which implies (C) I have FAR TOO MUCH time on my hands...

Well brace yourself readers because another 20 cent coin has been minted/munted. As you can see below this new coin commemorates the marriage of Prince William to that 'commoner' Kate.

While it does seem a little retrograde that Australia is commemorating a wedding in England between two non-Australians, my main problem with the coin is the inept an unattractive depictions of Will and Kate on the coin. The pictures on the minted coin look nothing like them. It is as though the Mint asked some unskilled hack, like myself, to knock up the coin during a double metal-work lesson between recess and lunch.

I think the main problem is that the designer chose to depict Kate and Will with open mouths and therefore was required to depict teeth; most numismatic portraits feature closed mouths and for good reason: Kate and Will manage to look both skeletal and demonic with their toothy coiny grins. As anyone who had fillings in their teeth would appreciate - metal and teeth don't look good together.

I suggest that you look out for the coin because the true hideousness of the teeth can only be appreciated in 3D. And when you see how bad it is you will smile. Just don't mint that smile. 'Cos it won't look good.




11 January 2011

My Twenty Cents Worth...

Australia has a new commemorative 20 cent piece. 'Ooh', you must be thinking, it must be celebrating the anniversary of a defining moment in our country's history or perhaps to honour some worthy dignitary or even a selfless volunteer group that's donated time and money to helping others.
WRONG!

The coin commemorates the 100th anniversary of the Australian Taxation Office.
What's next - a coin to celebrate the anniversary of the GST?

Why would they mint this? Who really cares?

The coin does not even have the benefit of being aesthetically pleasing. It looks as though it has tape-worms crawling over it...

I should think that considering it is honouring the Tax Office the 20 cent coin should only be worth about 12 cents...

20 December 2010

Weird Books make excellent Kris Kringle presents!

Struggling for Christmas presents at the last minute? Might I suggest one of the following fascinating and weirdly-titled books?
Why Do I Vomit?

What Not to Wear on a Horse

What Moles Tell You About Yourself


teach your WIFE to be a WIDOW:
A wise and comprehensive guide book for all wives prudent enough to prepare for that time when they may become head of the family.


How to Start your own Country


SOAP through the ages


The Popular Book of British Seaweeds
(which makes me wonder how dull the 'unpopular' Book of British Seaweeds must have been...)



The Great Pantyhose Crafts Book


Natural Bust Enlargement with Total Mind Power:
How to Use the Other 90 % of Your Mind to Increase the Size of Your Breasts


Make Your Own Sex Toys:
30 Quick and Easy Projects with Step-by-Step Pictures. A Personal Guide to a Better Sex Life.

(WTF? Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! )


Jewish Chess Masters on STAMPS

This must have been the sequel to 'Finnish Poker Champs on COINS'


The Humanure Handbook:
A guide to composting human manure.



Forensic Examination of Rubber Stamps



Erotic Dots:
Join the Dots to Create 69 Sexy and Exciting Pictures
(Hilarious! I want to see a porno Paint by Numbers next!)

Who Cares About Old People

The Recently Deflowered Girl:
The Right Thing to Say on Every Dubious Occasion


Remember Your Rubbers!:
Collectible Condom Containers - with values.

(This book comes in it's own slipcase...)


Castration: The Advantages and Disadvantages

(This version is complete and unabridged... :P)


Cadaver Dog Book:
Forensic Training and Tactics for the Recovery of Human Remains

(Apparently the working title for the book was FETCH!)

The Beverly Hillbillies Bible Study
(I'm offering a prize to anyone who can tell me what this book could possibly be about)



Anticraft:
Knitting Beading and Stitching for the Slightly Sinister


All About Scabs

and finally..................

50 Ways to Use Feminine Hygiene Products in a MANLY MANNER (for the Self-Assured Male)























28 June 2010

No cat no sink no upload

Knowing my penchant for animals a friend sent me a link to a website devoted to pictures of cats... more specifically pictures of cats in sinks, exclusively. What’s the website called? http://catsinsinks.com/ obviously. This website's 'No cat no sink no upload' policy is unusual I admit, but you have to admire men, but more likely, women willing to believe in something and fight for that belief; in this instance, the supremacy of pictures of cats in sinks. Genius.

Not a cat lover? Prefer dogs? Then look no further and welcome to http://www.beedogs.com/. This website is exclusively for pictures of dogs dressed in bee costumes.

But this is not just any random dogs-dressed-as-bees website. NoSireeBob it is not. In fact here’s a quote from the website making this point clearly:

Beedogs.com is the premier online repository for pictures of dogs in bee costumes.”

“Premier online repository” - That is quite an achievement considering how many ‘dogs-dressed-as-bees’ websites there must be out there… Sarcasm aside, I want this doggy.


You know that old saying about dogs and their owners looking like each other? Check this out...

I'm betting this woman is single. And if she is not I bet her partner wishes she was...

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